Dear EFT Community,
Figen Genco is an expert in personal organizing and shares her steps for using EFT to declutter your life.
You might consider adding "clutter" to your energy toxins list. Along with its proven negative effects on physical and emotional well being, just the word "clutter" itself may lower energy levels.
The American Heritage Dictionary of the English Language describes clutter as, "A confused or disordered state or collection; a jumble." And adds that the etymology of the word is probably from Middle English cloteren, to clot, from clot, lump, from Old English clott, which means "a thick, viscous, or coagulated mass or lump, as of blood."
"We shape our buildings and afterwards, our buildings shape us," said Winston Churchill. The kind of environment we live in has effects on our thinking, behaviorism, and health. A chaotic environment has an adverse effect on physical and emotional state.
Just like living with negative people might necessitate repetitive EFT applications, being in a hostile environment, where people's belongings are screaming at them, seems to trigger the negative emotion and behavior which result in fall-backs. Buckminster Fuller said, "Reform the environment, stop trying to reform the people. They will reform themselves if the environment is right." Once their environment is nurturing, people's behaviors change and they seek ways to be nurturing to themselves.
People in balanced and harmonious surroundings are much happier. They are more efficient and productive. They understand more easily and learn faster. They feel in control. They enjoy life, themselves, and whatever they do.
On the other hand, people in disorganized environments feel lost, anxious, dissatisfied, disappointed, overwhelmed, and unhappy. They get sick easily and their recovery takes longer.
In a welcoming, orderly, nurturing place with no or least amount of clutter, people respond to healing processes better. They are more open to the possibilities; they heal faster and stay that way. (Most people confirm that they sleep much better away from home in a hotel room. It is because hotel rooms do NOT have what people normally have in their bedrooms!)
Organizing with EFT consists of 9 phases each of which is performed in two sections;
a) Preparing the mind and the body for the targeted work, which is accomplished with EFT, and
b) Physically doing it.
Step 1: Stop the Incoming Clutter
Most organizing books suggest that getting rid of clutter is the first step in getting organized. This mostly means dealing with the clutter which has built up over the years. However, because of constant incoming data such as paper, objects and events, people are not even capable of catching up with daily arrivals let alone being able to concentrate on the previous build-up.
Some people go through big "clean up" cycles without creating a system. Others, overwhelmed with time constraints generated on them by others, feel that whatever comes their way is their priority. The results of both behaviors create a feeling of defeat and hopelessness about the targeted task.
If people first work on decreasing what is coming at them, they can feel an instant relief, and get immediate satisfaction. This creates the encouragement and motivation towards aiming for tackling years worth of old junk.
The "Stop the Clutter" phase is involved with taking actions such as decreasing or stopping junk mail, magazine and catalog subscriptions; limiting events and organizations that one is involved with; and eliminating unnecessary shopping.
There are 3 basic challenges in this step. Each challenge and appropriate set up and reminder phrase is described below.
A. Challenges with TIME
While tapping Karate Chop:
Even though I believe that I don't have time to work on getting organized, I deeply and completely accept myself.
I love and forgive myself for not creating time to get organized.
I love and forgive anyone else that contributes to my not having time to get organized.
Use the Reminder Phrases:
This belief of not having time, or
Not having enough time
Other phrases related to Time - Pick the ones which are true to you
Even though I don't think spending time on getting organized is worth my time, I deeply and completely accept myself.
I love and forgive myself for choosing to spend my time:
• watching TV
• reading magazines
• going shopping
• chatting on the phone
• going out
• surfing on the Internet
• [fill in the blank] instead of working on my organizing project.
Even though I believe that instead of spending my time getting organized, I could be creating something, and that being organized is going to kill my creativity, I choose to see that there might be a creative way to get organized and that if I am able to get to my things easier, I might be able to catch the inspiration when it hits, and I might be able to create more things, instead of constantly feeling lost.
B. Challenges with CAPABILITY
Challenges with capability have many different experiences and emotions attached. One person might have more than one of these aspects. The following list covers the most known feelings:
1. Feeling of overwhelm
2. Feeling of uncertainty
3. Feeling of hopelessness
4. Feeling lost
5. Feeling inadequate
6. Feeling of loss of control
7. Fear of failure
Experiences that trigger above feelings:
1. Giving up before starting because of not knowing where to start
2. Repeated failed attempts during the project
3. Mocking and criticism from family members, spouse, colleagues, boss
4. Not being able to reach the desired results
5. Not being able to maintain the acquired results.
Below are sample phrases that can be used by naming the appropriate feeling and the experience, while tapping the Karate Chop.
SAMPLE PHRASES with FEELINGS
• Even though I feel overwhelmed with the thought of unsubscribing from all these magazines, I deeply and completely accept myself.
• I love and forgive myself for not being able to say "NO" to solicitations.
• Even though I have no hope that I can ever catch up with my mail, I deeply and completely accept myself.
SAMPLE PHRASES with EXPERIENCES
• Even though I have failed to stop myself from giving my address out - to receive FREE gifts - I choose to realize that my time is much more valuable than those so-called gifts. I choose to stop letting these people decide what I should be reading, wearing, eating, As I deeply and completely accept myself.
• I love and forgive myself for picking up FREE stuff from stands and stores that end up in my junk drawers and end up never being used and wasting my space and energy.
• Even though I have no hope that I can ever catch up with my mail, I deeply and completely accept myself.
C. Challenges with FEAR
• Even though I am afraid that I will miss out on something I might need by unsubscribing from these catalogs and magazines, I deeply and completely accept myself.
• Even though I an afraid that people will judge me if I say NO to:
• some of the volunteer work,
• help requests
• invitation to events
• [fill in the blank] I love and forgive myself for not being able to stop buying all those things that I don't need or care for with the fear of not being able to catch up or fit in.
Check to see what else is hindering your flow throughout the day for two weeks. It is easier to recognize daily happenings than once in a while occurrences. Two weeks should be enough time for you to understand most of what is happening. Find out your local and national opt-out programs. Utilize them. Be wary of what comes into your space.
Step 2: Observing Habits
When people decide to get organized, very often what they do is rush to buy products which they think will help them get organized. Those products get buried under the piles of stuff, becoming part of the clutter. This is because “organized” is related to people more than it is to places.
“Organized” is about people’s habits, lifestyles, personalities, what motivates them and how they function. If spaces are given all the attention without taking people who are using them into consideration, what is achieved is aesthetics without functionality.
And this is why conflicts arise when one person who thinks he knows better creates an organization which becomes a total confusion for the other party.
Below are sample set-up phrases:
Even though my husband thinks I am a mess, I deeply and completely accept myself.
I love and forgive myself for not being able to match up to my husband’s standards
I love and forgive anyone else who has contributed and contributes to my mess.
Even though my wife thinks she is better than me because her desk area seems less cluttered, I deeply and completely accept myself.
Even though my children think I am a pack rat, and that they will have to deal with everything I saved when I pass away, I am open to the possibility of forgiving myself for all the things I gathered throughout the years.
Even though I feel guilty whenever I see other people’s cubicles so nice and orderly, I am open to feeling good about myself.
Even though my wife thinks I am a neat-nick, I deeply and completely accept myself.
I love and forgive myself for being obsessed.
Before you can get organized, you need to understand your ways of doing things. A conscious observation period is vital to be able to find solutions and create systems which will not crash and which will be used and maintained easily. In my practice, I ask many questions while I am creating systems with my clients.
They work along with me, and by watching, listening, observing, and understanding; I come up with different options that they can choose from.
Look around your space:
• Do you have “homes” for your belongings?
• Are there a lot of homeless objects and a papers floating around?
• Are there stray objects in the “homes” which are created for other things?
Watch yourself and figure out how you do things:
Are you a Perfectionist?
Are you a Procrastinator?
Do you follow the rules you create?
Do you put things back?
Do you shop without thinking?
Do you work on changing and adjusting spaces, and rules first instead of trying to change the person?
Answers to all these questions will be your road map to the system that you will create.
Setup Phrases for this Phase
Even though I want to do everything in a perfect way and I don’t have time to be able to do so; and I choose not to do anything, I am open to the possibility of deeply and completely accepting myself. Maybe I can remember this quote from Ernst Fischer “As machines become more and more efficient and perfect, so it will become clear that imperfection is the greatness of man.”
Even though I am afraid that if I create a system, it won’t work, and I will fail again; I chose to love myself anyway. After all, Edison tried over 10 thousand ways to create a light bulb until he found the correct way.
I will accept myself even if I end up putting the folders on top of the filing cabinet rather than inside of it. I will figure out a way to still be able to function without the place looking perfect.
Even though whenever I walk in the house I throw my jacket on the couch rather than hanging it in the coat closet, I forgive myself. Maybe if I clean out the coat closet first, and make room for currently used jackets, I might be more inclined to want to open the closet door, and hang my jacket in there.
Even though I don’t have the faintest idea how to organize my stuff, I choose to be open and learn instead of giving up on myself. Maybe if I watch myself and learn my habits, I might be able to come up with brilliant ideas with my creativity.
Step 3: Eliminate the Unnecessary
Eliminating the Unnecessary covers 4 areas:
1. Eliminating the unnecessary behaviors
There is a story about a cooking a holiday ham. The mom is busy in the kitchen preparing a holiday ham, and her son is watching her. He sees her cutting both ends off the ham before placing it in a baking tray. He asks, “Mommy, why do you cut the ends of the ham off?” His mother answers, “That’s how my mother always did it.”
So the boy calls his grandmother. “Grandma, why do you cut the ends of the ham off before you bake it?” “That’s how my mother always did it.” The young boy calls the great-grandmother. “Great Grandma, why do you always cut the ends of the ham before you cook it?” She answers, “Because it doesn’t fit in my pan.”
How many extra steps are you taking while you do things just because you assumed it is the right way to do it?
Even though I always [fill in the blank] because Mom, Dad, etc. told/taught/showed me so, and I have never thought of trying different ways, as I deeply and completely accept myself.
I never questioned its validity, and even sometimes this caused conflict between my spouse and me, and I argued that mine is the correct way to do it; I love and forgive myself for not being open to the new ways and possibilities.
Through careful thinking and decided action with help of EFT, you can free up a lot of time and space, and have peace and happiness in your life.
2. Eliminating the unnecessary objects
There are two categories under the heading of unnecessary objects. The first category is the old clutter from many years before. These types of objects are stored mostly in the attic, in the basement, in the storage facilities, and sometimes in the garage. Dealing with this kind of clutter is a very hard and common challenge, so it will be explained in depth in Phase 7 of this article series.
The second category of the unnecessary objects consists of things that occupy our active space and have no value or function in our current lives. When these things linger around long enough, they become “old clutter.” They get packed during the first move, and never leave those taped-shut boxes in the following many moves. They cover our space, gather dust, and waste your time and energy, whenever you move them around to open up more space for more of it!
Even though I know that I will never use these leftover materials from the craft workshop I took last month, I can’t bring myself to get rid of them, I deeply and completely accept myself.
I paid all this money for them and for the workshop, so I feel guilty if I get rid of them.
Maybe if I find someone who interested in the same hobby, I might not feel so bad about letting them go. This way I will have more space in my room for my current hobby.
3. Eliminating the unnecessary people
Some people always seem to have something negative to say. Regardless of who and what they are talking about, listening to them, or even just being in the same environment pulls you down to their energy level unless you are very grounded.
You might find yourself depressed, less productive, and upset when they leave. It is best to eliminate these kinds of people from your life, or if that is not possible avoid encounters with them as much as you can. And according to Feng Shui traditions, opening up space symbolically and literally frees up space for the new things that you wish in your life. So you can have the type of people you want in your life by letting go of the ones you do not need.
Even though I am tired of listening to my friend ___ gossip about other people, I deeply and completely accept myself.
I love and forgive myself for not wanting to visit/hang out with my ___ anymore.
It seems that every time we go out, my energy is drained. She keeps complaining about her ___ and I am tired of listening.
I love and forgive myself for letting ___ misuse my kindness and keep asking me for constant favors. My other friends tell me he is using me but I just cannot say “No”. I accept myself anyway.
Maybe if I practice in front of the mirror about saying No to him, I might be able to do it nicely.
4. Eliminating the unnecessary events and activities
Sometimes people get into things with different expectations, but they turn out to be very useless events.
Even though being involved with this committee has been nothing but headache and waste of time, I still can’t leave. I choose to forgive myself anyway. Maybe I am just afraid of what others may think if I leave.
Then maybe I will tap on my fear of others’ judgments, leave the committee and do something better with my time.
I love and forgive myself for not being able to get out of this volunteer work I was pulled into. &It doesn’t seem to work the way they explained from the beginning and I have lost my belief in it.
Now I am embarrassed to say that I want to leave. I accept myself anyway.
Even though I think I have to register my kids every activity that all the neighbors’ kids are attending, then I have to drive them every where and they complain and I have no time to do anything, I accept myself.
Maybe I can let children be children and do nothing for a change. I can relax and they can relax!
Step 4: Defeating Procrastination
Procrastination comes from the ancient Latin word procrastinatus: pro (forward) and crastinus (of tomorrow). Thus the word means forwarding it to tomorrow. I saw a sign at a restaurant which read: “Free Beer Tomorrow”. And if you went there tomorrow, this sign will still read tomorrow! For most people when they say “I’ll do it tomorrow!” same rule applies! If you really want to do it, you put a real date on it.
Procrastination is defined as avoidance of an action or task, and it is often linked with perfectionism. For whatever reason, when a person procrastinates, this behavior causes him anxiety, stress, guilt, and sometimes physical manifestations in the body as headaches and insomnia.
The procrastinating behavior causes loss of productivity, tension and crisis, disappointment in self and others for not fulfilling responsibilities and commitments. While procrastinating is considered normal to some degree, chronic procrastination may be a sign of underlying emotional, psychological or physiological disorders.
Main causes of procrastinating behavior are examined under 3 categories:
1. Environmental/External: Disorganization, cluttered spaces, nagging people.
2. Emotional/Internal: Feeling of overwhelm, indecisiveness, perfectionism.
3. Physical and Mental Illness: OCD, ADD, depression.
We might actually to some extent integrate the last cause – Physical and Mental Illness- under “Emotional” considering with EFT education and energy psychology information, we believe that most of those challenges are caused by an emotional imbalance in the body’s energy system.
Below are some sample setup and tap-along phrases that can give you an idea how you can use EFT for yourself or your clients.
Even though I have been procrastinating on writing this annual report, I deeply and completely accept myself.
I love and forgive myself for not wanting to even start the report. Maybe if I ask the director and get better instructions about how he wants it, I might be able to bring myself work on it.
It seems to me I don’t start because I am afraid to make a mistake and have to do it all over again.
Even though I have been delaying in organizing the basement, I deeply and completely accept myself.
Maybe I am afraid to face those boxes from my parents who passed away some time ago. I don’t think it is the physical work that I am procrastinating on. I just get overwhelmed with the thought of opening those boxes filled with memories. I have no clue what’s in those boxes. I love myself anyway.
I love and forgive myself for not organizing those bags and bags of pictures stuffed in my bedroom closet. There are so many pictures, negatives, CDs, and greeting cards. I don’t know what to do with them.
So, I’d rather keep shoving them in the closet. Maybe if I just take a handful of them, put them in picture boxes with dates on them, I might be able to sort them and eventually put in albums.
I forgive myself for feeling overwhelmed with how much I have and continue taking tons of pictures.
If you are able to observe and discover the reason for the procrastinating behavior, it will be easy to target what needs to be tapped with EFT. However; even if you do NOT know the particular reason of your, or your clients’ procrastination, you can still successfully use EFT to unblock, and uncover the underlying challenge.
1. Emotional Causes
Even though I don’t know why I keep postponing making this phone call, I deeply and completely accept myself.
• You might realize that you are afraid of the outcome of the phone call
• You might realize that you don’t like the person who answers the phone
• You might realize that the person who answers the phone talks too much. When you realize the core cause, it will be much easier to create a solution, or tactic. And if there are emotions and blockages attached to the procrastinating behavior, EFT will create miracles!
2. Physical Causes
Even though I don’t know why I keep procrastinating about doing the laundry, I am open to the answer come to me.
Then you might realize that it is not DOING the LAUNDRY but it is the laundry room that is stopping you from performing the related task. When you organize your laundry room, and put some cheerful posters up, or bring in plants that energize you, you might find yourself doing the laundry happily!
Step 5: Creating a Functioning System
If a child is constantly being yelled at to clean up his room, and all he does is to hide everything under the bed and in the closet, it might be because he doesn’t have sufficient space and knowledge about how to do it. Rather than writing, “You are a mess” on his mental walls, it is advisable to figure out why the situation happens.
Is it because something is missing such as shelving, or is it because there is too much stuff? Is it because the drawers in his chest keep getting stuck, or because he does not like folding his clothes?
Creating a functioning system is a process which necessitates understanding needs and one’s self. One third of it is observations, one third of it is tools, and one third of it is the space. If you only go by the space and the furniture, you might still end up with a mess when we don’t add the person who will use the space in the equation.
For example, you cannot order a closet system and expect that it will work wonders because you have paid thousands for it. Most closet companies give you a system according to your space and whatever accessories you think are “nice”. After the installation, your clothes might still end up on the floor, on the bed, and on the exercise machine because you didn’t factor in if you:
• Like to fold, throw* or hang your clothes
• Prefer to see them, or do you want them in drawers
• Have long/short, bulky…etc clothes.
• Like to group them according to color, season, length, type or your dressing style
By making observations about your likes, dislikes and habits, you can avoid living in guilt for the things which you are not responsible for. For example, you might have a nice closet system in your closet but it might not be suitable for your habits. When you see the clothes on the floor, you will immediately blame yourself. In reality it might be that the closet system does not work for you! It might be that the closet door only opens half way and blocks the rest of the closet. By being aware of what is happening, you can stop concentrating on the problem and blaming yourself. And when you are at peace with yourself, you can think clearly and create something that works for you.
Some sample phrases to clean out the guilt and gain clarity could be:
Even though I hate folding my clothes, I deeply and completely accept myself.
I love and forgive myself for throwing my clothes wherever. Because when I DO fold them and put them nicely on the shelves, every time I take something, the whole shelf of clothes falls down and I get frustrated.
Maybe these shelves just don’t work for me. Or maybe I don’t like to fold my clothes.”
*Some clothes can be just thrown in bins, such as gym clothes, or bulky sweat pans. Everything does NOT need to be folded. Organized does NOT mean "neat," It means accessibility and functionality.
Step 6: Understand Paper Management
Paper management is one of the biggest problems people face today - when we are supposed to be "paperless." Statistics indicate that there are more than 650,000,000 pages printed from computers every day. That's enough to fill a file drawer 180 miles long! And there are 178.9 billion fax pages sent/received per day; a 1500% increase in only the past 5 years! Where does all this paper go? It ends up on top of your desk, cabinets, windowsills, drawers, kitchen counters, dining room table. And when you will have guests, it goes into paper bags to be hidden under the sink, inside the dryers, and pantries!
• Paper clutter is a big part of the clutter people suffer from. It is also one of most overwhelming kind of clutter because;
• Most people don't know what to do with it.
• It keeps coming in through many means.
• Each piece needs reading, thus taking much longer to sort than other kind of clutter.
• Can be related to deep emotional scars- letters-photos-emails from certain times.
• You don't get visual gratification as much as organizing a room.
Here are some EFT Set-Up phrases to get you started:
Even though I feel like I am drowning under paper, I understand that many people suffer from the same problem, I deeply and completely accept myself.
Even though, I don't feel like dealing with it, I deeply and completely accept myself.
Even though we haven't been able to use our dining room table for so long, I am open to the possibility of forgiving myself for letting the piles of paper grow so high.
Even though I still hold onto letters from my old boyfriends, and keep them in my bedroom closet, I am open to the possibility of considering letting go off them. Maybe this way, I might concentrate on my current relationship/ marriage instead of feeling stuck in the past.
Even though I have no clue how to set up easy, practical filing systems, I am open to asking other people, reading some articles, and playing with creating something for myself. I realize that what I create doesn't have to be perfect. I understand that I can always change things around. I choose to see that if a system doesn't work, it means that the system and my habits do not match. It has nothing to do with me as a PERSON.
Even though I am afraid to let go off some papers thinking I might need them, I see that I have no clue about what I have and where I have it, so I might as well let go off most that I don't use until I make my piles manageable to create a system.
Even though I want to hold onto the article clippings from newspapers and magazines, I accept the fact that almost everything is on the Internet now. Maybe I can let go off the control and enjoy my breathing space!
Even though my magazines look really nice, and I can't bring myself to discard them, I understand that there is no way for me to get back to a certain article unless I search for days. I realize that I like looking at certain pictures which triggers my creativity and the things with I want to do with my life. Maybe I can just cut those pictures and create a brain map.
What you can do physically
Stop it before it gets to you! It is much harder to get rid of something once it is in your territory. Just because somebody sent you something, it doesn't mean that you have to accept it.
Make your own decisions. If it doesn't contribute to your life, get rid of it.
Set up a system that works for you. Books are written for general audiences, you can get ideas, but don't expect to find the exact answer, adjust it to yourself. Organizing tools are designed to be "cute" for females and "important looking" for males - neither means it will address your specific needs. Create your own, or adjust the tool. Don't try to adapt yourself to the tool.
Use the technology to your advantage. People, who don't have a working paper system, create the same chaos in their electronic files. Create categories for the files and emails you really need. The same rule applies - just because someone sent you something, you don't have to keep it.
Step 7: Getting Rid of Old Clutter
While working with EFT, going through old boxes of stuff is a very fast and amazing method to uncover the cause of the problems that are currently present in our lives. Most the time these boxes contain things that are directly related to our past, and we can have immediate access to the memories. Thus we kill two birds with one stone; get rid of the physical clutter, and get rid of the emotional clutter.
"Old clutter" mostly exists in boxes of stuff from previous moves which are left unopened. It can also be found in boxes of things not wanted or needed anymore, but shoved in the basements, attics, and garages FOR NOW! Getting rid of things comes with a lot of guilt and many "should and shouldn't have’s”. It comes with fear and many thoughts of negative consequences. So it is easier to just pack them away in a nearby space by rather than making a radical decision to get rid of them.
According to Feng Shui principals, even though the clutter is boxed and put away, it still affects us energetically. People who hold onto things get stuck in the past, they can't get over past hurts, and most of the time feel stuck and can't move forward. Opening physical space in our environment frees up emotional space as well. New desired changes, things, and people enter our lives much easier.
At my seminars I ask my audience, if you didn't own anything, what would you do? They get a naughty smile on their face and they say, "Anything I want.”
Going through this old stuff is painful and overwhelming. However, using EFT will take the edge off so that you can live through all the memories, experiences, events, and remember people. And you will make your closures and say your Goodbyes. Start with following general EFT phrases.
Sample EFT phrases:
Even though I feel overwhelmed thinking about opening this box, I deeply and completely accept myself.
Even though I feel sad looking at these things, it actually helps me understand why I get so sad during __ (certain time of the year), I deeply and completely accept myself.
Even though I don't understand why I hold onto theses things, I am afraid to throw them away… Maybe if I tap a few more rounds, I might see that I won't have the fear of not having them anymore, I deeply and completely accept myself.
Even though I am so angry at __ for letting me save __ , I deeply and completely accept myself.
Even though I feel overwhelmed thinking about opening this box, I deeply and completely accept myself.
When you feel that you are ready to go on start working on the boxes. Every time you feel the anxiety is rising, stop and tap for your anxiety. And during the process, check on yourself and note what other feelings are coming up related to past events. Then, create appropriate phrases to address the root of your specific challenges. Or find an EFT practitioner who can help you during the process.
Most time management challenges are directly related to clutter and disorganization. Whether it is at work or home, when you have a working system in place, it is much easier to manage the time. All the time that is spent trying to access things and looking for things is freed up.
Also, because you operate effortlessly and efficiently, you get more done in a shorter time, thus releasing more time. This puts you in a very good mood, which helps with your physical and emotional health; and you save even more time - the time that is spent as a result of sicknesses.
There is also another aspect to consider when we look at managing time. Time management actually means managing the activities that fill up our time. So, if someone does not find time to exercise, this might be because that person does NOT really want to exercise.
With EFT, one can discover if the problem actually originates from the time constraints or other emotional blockages.
In this case a helpful setup phrase could be,
Even though, I claim that I don't have time to exercise, I deeply and completely accept myself.
This opens up a door for possible past blocking events related to exercising experiences. Then appropriate EFT setup phrases are applied to address the causes. (Find an EFT practitioner to do the detective work properly)
Below are a few sample set up phrases for variety of situations related to problems with both aspects of time management. There are many other situations to be taken into account, which we do not have space for in this article.
Even though I don't believe that I have time to exercise, I might be able to go for walk/take the dog for a walk.
Even though I hold onto these articles, magazines, and newspapers thinking that I will read them one day, they just seem to pile up and I never seem to have time to read them, I deeply and completely accept myself.
Maybe if I get rid of most of the information that I can find on the Internet, I might have a more manageable and realistic "To Read" pile.
Then, I can grab some of those every time I go to a doctor's appointment and read my pile instead of the magazines in the waiting room.
I love and forgive myself for thinking I should be reading more than I can.
Even though I am afraid that I will miss something if I throw out a newspaper without reading every section, I deeply and completely accept myself.
Even though I find myself constantly reading my email, and not attending to the other work that needs to taken care of on my desk, I deeply and completely accept myself.
Maybe if I only open my email program at certain times during the day, I might avoid getting distracted with incoming mail. I am sure I will figure out the best times to do this. I love myself for figuring out a solution.
Even though I feel that I am being rude when I tell people that I am busy, maybe if I put a sign with my available hours next to my office door, and close my door while I am working on projects, people might respect that.
I love and forgive myself for letting others interrupt me while I am working.
Even though I'd rather do everything myself, instead of delegating to others, I deeply and completely accept myself.
I love and forgive myself for thinking that any way other than my way of doing things is wrong. I love and forgive anyone else who might have contributed to this kind of thinking.
If I think that there are trillions of people in the world and they all manage to do things in their own ways, maybe I can let go off some jobs that I can delegate, and enjoy some extra time.
Step 9: Maintaining Order
After everything is de-cluttered, systematized, and organized, you will need to put things away to be able to keep the order. From time to time you might slide back. That is OK. As long as you have good system in place, it will be very fast and easy to put things away.
However there are certain roadblocks I notice with the clients I work with, and from the questions I get from my readers and audience. Below are sample setup phrases for the most common situations in the Maintaining Order Phase.
Tap with me:
Even though I understand that time to time, spaces will get messy, I deeply and completely accept myself.
I love and forgive myself for letting it go and becoming this way during the week. I understand that life goes on and new, incoming things do NOT stop and wait for me to work on maintaining the house and my office. I love myself anyway.
Even though I thought that once I had cleaned up and organized everything, it would stay that way. I see that it is not the case. Now I understand that just like taking vitamins, eating food, and taking showers; keeping up with maintaining the organization requires working at it EVERYDAY. I accept it the way it is and I accept myself.
Even though I feel overwhelmed with all the things that need maintaining, maybe if I learn to enlist my family or my employees, I might be able to catch up with what needs to be done easier. Maybe I can let go of having to be in control all the time, and let others help me in the ways they can help me, rather than trying to teach them my ways. I accept myself the way I am and I am open to accepting them the way they are.
Even though I am trying to make my house look like the ones in the catalogs, I am open to the possibility of understanding that those are photos of staged rooms to give a certain impression and to be able to sell products and services. They are not real. So it is OK that my home does not look that way. I love and accept myself.
Even though I am constantly buying and saving magazines, and shopping for new products, thus adding to the things that need to be maintained, I am open to the idea of reducing the magazine subscriptions, and the newspaper clippings I save. I understand that I can find information on almost everything on the internet now. And I know that I can go to a local library to access it even if I don’t have access at home. I promise myself to work on it. I love myself for helping ME work on the habits that I want to change.
Even though I don’t feel like putting things away every time I use them, I know that this is how thing get messy. And later on I will have to deal with more work. It becomes more overwhelming when it builds up. I will be more inclined to put things away if I can picture myself finding them in their homes when I access them next time. It already puts a smile on my face when I see myself getting to my things easily. This positive picture will work better than feeling bad about myself when I do not placing them back. Yes, I will work on the positive picture and change my behavior. I love myself.
Keep tapping and working at it. You will feel better and better everyday. To your happy organized life!