TappyBear Helps Client Focus during EFT Tappinga guide to tappy bear book

By Joy Dolci

Julia’s neck, upper chest, and chin break out in red rash and or hives whenever she is in any social interaction, or when asked a question. She has been to other therapists over the years and nothing has helped. There were many aspects she talked about, none of which seemed to aggravate the rash (a very visual indication of level of intensity).

However, when she started talking about her mother being threatened with a gun by her father she Julia was 5 years old, her level of intensity was propelled to a 10+ on a scale of 0 to 10.

I started to use several techniques like the Movie Technique, but she kept being elusive and jumping out of focus, with another aspect coming up every other sentence. Consequently, her level of intensity dropped to a 3 out of 10 on the new issue, “I don’t feel safe with my mother” due to suppression.

My usual focus techniques were not successful and I could feel the wall of resistance. So I picked up my TappyBear who always sits nearby. I asked Julia to talk to Tappy and say whatever she wanted to tell her mother. She started off very calmly, but this time she did stay focused on talking to her mother.

Julia: “You ran and used me as a shield against my father because you said he wouldn’t shoot me … You had me look over the hedge to see where he was ... I was really scared”... until statements started:

“I want you to die … Stop torturing me … You cause me so much pain … Grow the h--- up … You always make me feel bad.”  

At this point, her level of intensity was 10+, her rash was very red, and she started shaking Tappy. He just kept smiling calmly even though he was all shook up as she continued, “You make me sick … I want you to suffer!!!”

At this point, we started tapping. She repeated after me without interrupting or jumping issues: Even though I can’t trust my mother to keep me safe…

Other statements used on different points: you make me sick, you scare me

We did this for three rounds. Then we did the Gratitude Ball, for which you take a deep breath, open your arms wide as if hugging a big ball, fill it with love and gratitude, and bring this love and gratitude ball in to your heart as you exhale.  

When I checked Julia's level of intensity, it was down from 10+ to a 4 out of 10.

We did another round of tapping, including You never protect me … I want you to suffer … Grow the H---- up …, whereupon I got a smile from Julia. 

We did the Gratitude Ball. Her level of intensity was at 1 out of 10 with no facial redness.

Finally, we did the floor to ceiling eye roll while repeating the above statements and her level of intensity was at 0. We then followed up with two other clearing statements, with her tapping for herself for three rounds, using the following:

Even though I can’t trust anybody else because I can’t trust my mother, I deeply and completely love, accept, and forgive myself and my mother.

Even though I don’t feel safe to be me because of all the bad things my mother told me, I deeply and completely love, accept, and forgive myself and my mother.

Her level of intensity went from 9 to 0 out of 10, there was no redness, and she said she felt lighter and calmer.

Homework: Tap on “I allow myself to remember the feeling of love and light” and “I choose to feel that I am safe.”

When Julia came for her next session, she said her mother had come by unexpectedly and she was able to visit with her comfortably without any feelings of fear or resentment for the first time in years. We are continuing to work on other issues contributing to her rash.

What was remarkable was the focus, the tuning in part that is so important for any tapping to be successful.  Trying to focus or grab a handle on the issue was like grabbing a round, wet soap bar. The memories were so traumatic that she did everything in her power to elude the issue. With trading looking into my eyes for looking into TappyBear's eyes and giving her free range for her feelings to flow, I could feel the floodgates open, giving me all sorts of statements to tap on as well as enough reduction in resistance for her to allow effective tapping on the issue.  (I allowed her to take TappyBear home to visit for a couple of days until her next session.)

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