Inner Dialogues is an excellent technique for going within, directly to the source of the problem or condition. The concept is to make friends–create a new and better relationship–with whatever part of you is presenting an issue. Typically when the body presents an issue (such as pain), we tend to isolate it and blame it rather than give it our whole-hearted nurturing and care. When we release blame and judgment and reassure whatever part of us has the issue, the whole being can then bring the body’s natural healing ability to the scene. My experience of this is that it can be very powerful and healing.
There are four categories of Inner Dialogue:
Whole Body Dialogues for when the body is exhibiting general issues such as tiredness, lack of passion, pain all over, chronic fatigue, body sensitivities to outside influences (allergies), or anything else that affects the whole body.
Pinpoint Body Dialogues for working with a specific organ or area of the body such as a broken limb, pancreas (if the issue is diabetes), liver, brain, or any system in the body (immune system, metabolism, digestive system, nervous system) that might be in need of healing.
Inner Child Dialogues for when the Inner Child has not integrated with the whole being. This happens when there is a lack of safety, nurturing, and lack of play. It is a fact that when the Inner Child is in fear and acting out, we all act like a 3-5-year-old, which is usually NOT a solution to the problem. This issue can affect us more than we may realize!
Saboteur Dialogues for when something presents itself as being a block to healing. It may have a color or texture and also be a sensation of some kind. Examples are: heaviness in the abdomen, tightness in the throat, a brick-like wall in the solar plexus, a black hole in the belly. The Saboteur takes away our motivation to move forward.
What Exactly Is the Technique of Inner Dialogues?
Basically, Inner Dialogues is having a heartful conversation with whatever area is presenting the issue that you want to heal. Most of us have parts that we don’t want to acknowledge and we have been taught to either ignore or judge and blame them. Examples are:
- A body in pain
- A part of the body that is limiting you by pain or immobility
- An inner child that is still stomping its feet and upset at the lack of nurturance and not being listened to or acknowledged
- A saboteur that stops you from moving forward and makes you feel like a failure
All of the above could probably use a new beginning, a relationship that is nurturing and that allows the body its natural healing process instead of the judgment and isolation we usually bring to all of the above.
How Do I Do Inner Dialogues?
Inner Dialogues are done with continual tapping, beginning with the side of the hand point and going through all the points of EFT’s shortcut version.
I rarely use only Inner Dialogues in a session, however this technique can lead to deep insights and healings. When a specific trauma or event arises, I often shift to traditional EFT, using the Setup phrase at the Psychological Reversal point and a Reminder phrase at the rest of the tapping points. After the specific trauma is released, I return to the Inner Dialogue for further healing and/or to ask for feedback.
When I ask for feedback from whatever part I am working with, I do at least one round of continual tapping without words, while listening for that still small voice or a feeling within to guide me. I suggest that you not be too logical.
Inner Dialogues Protocol
You may add appropriate wording for your particular dialogue. However, there are also components that need to be included. These are:
Introduce yourself and state that you have a heartfelt intention toward whatever you are working with.
State that you never realized before that you cannot heal whatever it is you want to heal while isolated or blaming any part of yourself. Explain that what your heart wants to do now is heal all the old patterns and things that happened and create a new life “together,” supporting all parts of you.
State that you know you have old patterns and can’t promise you will never go back to them; however, it is your heart’s intent to heal everything that stands between you and whatever part you are working on.
Ask for forgiveness for everything you may have done intentionally or unintentionally that may have caused pain to whatever part you are working on.
Do NOT say you forgive the part you are working with, as that is arrogant. You ask for forgiveness because it is you that did not get the message from the rest of you. Your forgiving of whatever part you are working with comes later, if still needed.
Ask what the part needs from you now. Then do at least one round of continual tapping until you get some kind of voice or feeling. Please do NOT be too practical or logical about this.
If you do not hear from that part, perhaps it is still not trusting you. I would be persistent–gentle and persistent.
If you make a promise while doing an Inner Dialogue, either deliver that promise or do another Inner Dialogue and tell that part of yourself you promised that you can’t do whatever you promised.