Dear EFT Community,
Nancy Morris offers an article describing how she helped her client use EFT to release her blocks to achieving an orgasm with her partner.
EFTUniverse
When Cheryl contacted me she was frustrated by her inability to orgasm with her partner.
In her mid-forties, she had never had an orgasm with any partner.
When I asked what her goal was she said “any orgasm with a partner would be a success, but the best would be orgasm with intercourse.”
For brevity’s sake I won’t go into a lot of detail with exact tapping phrases but will focus here on the blocks that were in the way for Cheryl. As always I began by asking her some general questions about her sexual history, her upbringing, her religious beliefs, and her past relationships.
During this inquiry Cheryl, who is now a successful and confident professional, admitted that she was reluctant to give up control and she was afraid of being emotionally hurt.
I’ll note parts of our sessions here just to give a sense of the areas we worked on. In each case we looked for specific events from Cheryl’s past that convinced her of her current beliefs so we could clear them.
Control issues/fear of getting hurt: Cheryl knows what feels good to her physically but holds back in telling her partner (we’ll call him Joe). As we worked through this, Cheryl noticed even more how she holds back with Joe and experienced sadness about not wanting to need anyone.
We cleared a specific event regarding her first boyfriend; i.e., she was glad she never had sex with him because broke her heart as a teenager.
Even though Joe was eager for guidance from her, Cheryl felt “embarrassed/yucky” and could not talk to him about what she likes.
We cleared many specific events from a prior long-term relationship that was unhappy and unsatisfying where communication seemed futile.
Then we tackled guilt feelings from family or origin and specific events contributing to this guilt. Then Cheryl’s fear of being vulnerable came up; she felt unwilling to relax and trust. We cleared many resentments toward Joe (when we’re angry with someone it’s hard to give ourselves to them).
Cheryl now felt ready to talk to Joe about wanting help from him so she can experience more pleasure. While tapping, we practiced specific phrases that Cheryl would say until she felt more much more comfortable speaking the words. As we moved toward Cheryl being more open, vulnerable and asking for what she needs/likes in bed, she felt anger at herself for accepting all these years of her life without having an orgasm with her partner(s).
We worked on forgiving herself and this even strengthened Cheryl’s commitment to change.
Initial Success: Cheryl had two orgasms with Joe. After this, we continued working on specific sexual issues Cheryl wanted to address. For example, oral sex and the ability to speak more freely about sex since she noticed that she still is not fully saying and doing what she wants during sex and she really wants to change that.
More specific events from past relationships are cleared plus current anger and frustrations with Joe as they occur to keep her clear and open to him.
More success: Cheryl had her first orgasm during intercourse! She continues to enjoy expanding her communication and pleasure.
It is so gratifying for me to be let into clients’ private lives and to be able to be on their team as they pursue their goals. Both Cheryl and Joe are glad that she had the courage to take action.
