By Dawson Church, PhD
The term “self-image” refers to a generally negative feeling about oneself. Authorities on the subject have not developed a precise definition for it nor have they pinpointed an exact cause.
Accordingly, there is no agreed upon way to handle it.
EFT, by contrast, is much more precise in its approach and pinpoints an exact cause.
Here it is:
The cause of poor self-image is an accumulation of negative emotions about one’s self. This is self-evident and is stated her because in these terms , EFT makes eminently good sense. If we eliminate the negative emotions, then we eliminate the cause. And without the cause the poor self-image fades away.
And what better tool to eliminate the negative emotions than EFT?
Poor self-image may be the world’s number one ailment, It is so prevalent that almost everyone carries around some degree of it. Our self-image is often equated with our self-confidence. We tend to “radiate” and others pick up on it, whether we want them to or not. Accordingly, our self-image has a major effect on our business, social, and personal performance.
Sometimes jobs, promotions, and sales are won or lost depending on how we radiate our inner thoughts to others.
Friendships and romantic encounters can flourish or die depending on how we project our feelings about ourselves. The lower our self-image, the easier it is to get upset and the more intense become our anger, guilt, jealousy, and other emotional responses.
When our self-image is low we tend to stay stuck in one place. We don’t venture into the new business or get out of that abusive relationship or try something new.
Some parts of our lives can be very dull and depressing.
In short, our self image is the centerpiece of our emotional strength. The quality of our lives often depends on it.
Go to the self-help section of any major bookstore and there you will find countless books with solutions to the self-image problem. In general, they emphasize positive attitudes and give exercises for looking at the brighter side of life.
They encourage focusing on your strengths rather than your weaknesses and some emphasize visualization and affirmations to help you achieve these things. I applaud them all.
I’m in favor of anything that helps and many of these approaches do help people improve their self-esteem.
The results are a bit spotty, however. An improvement here. A new attitude there.
Rarely does anyone achieve an across-the-board, dramatically improved self-image with these tools.
The reason so many of these techniques fall short is that they do little to neutralize the self-doubt and negative feelings that make up the poor self-image. Rather, they try to overwhelm them with mega-doses of positivism.
This is a laudable effort, of course, but’s ones established self-doubts and negative feelings can be rather stubborn. If your journey through life is like a bus ride, then these self-doubts and negative feelings are passengers on your bus. You are at the wheel and they are your “backseat drivers” who think they can own the front seats. Conventional methods won’t move them much.
EFT offers a refreshing new approach to this problem wherein dramatic across-the-board changes do occur.
I have seen people totally transformed by these techniques. Their mannerisms posture, words, and gestures all change to reflect a more positive, self-assured person. Their friends and coworkers comment on the “new” person that has evolved before their eyes.
Rather than try to install new attitudes and perspectives, as conventional methods tend to do, EFT effectively liberates people from their self-doubts and negative feelings. EFT loosens those unwanted passengers from their front seat positions and kicks them off the bus. Once off the bus, the no longer contribute to a poor self-image.
The self-doubts and negative feelings that make up a poor self-image are forms of negative emotions, which of course, are wheat EFT was designed to handle.
Remember the discovery statement on which EFT is built:
The cause of all negative emotions is a disruption in the body’s energy system.
With this in mind, the process to improve your self-image is simple. Just perform the Basic Recipe on every negative emotion you have. One by one, they leave and, as they do, the balance between your positive and negative emotions shifts inevitably toward the positive. A refreshing and confident new self-image bubbles up to the surface. The unwanted passengers and their baggage have been thrown off your bus.
Excerpted from The EFT Manual
By Dawson Church, PhD