EFT helps clear the old triggers that have us reacting instead of choosing how we want to respond. We may discover, however, that we resist tapping even though we know it will be beneficial. This was true for Caitlin Williams, MEd. In her article, she explores the subject of resistance the under lying cause.
I am a seasoned EFT practitioner, offer trainings in EFT, and use it daily in my psychotherapy practice. I constantly notice with clients and with myself the times I forget or even resist using the technique to clear distress, and am always looking for way to understand and “cure” that resistance.
This personal story is about that cure.
The other night I was extremely distressed about a painful issue in my life, and after going to bed, barely slept, and woke early in the a.m. feeling as bad as I had when I went to bed. After obsessing and fretting over the painful issue for another period of time, I finally noticed that I wasn’t tapping, and not only that, I was resistant to tapping. It almost felt like it would intrude on my “dealing with it” in my head.
But, I did it anyway, because even though at the time I couldn’t understand my resistance, I knew I needed to tap.
And of course, it made an enormous difference, as we all know it would, and I felt lighter, less despairing, and more able to imagine coping with the situation that felt so threatening just a few minutes ago. And it didn’t even take that long, probably 5-10 rounds on various aspects of what I had just been experiencing as a trauma.
So now I really wanted to figure out what the resistance was about.
And what I came up with, for this incident in particular, was that deep down inside, unconsciously, I believed that the only thing that would help was for the actual situation to change. And my psyche was hell-bent on figuring out what to “do” to change the situation! Thus all the obsessing and fretting, which just served to keep me anxious and upset and desperate.
It wasn’t until I began tapping that my body began to relax, move out of the extreme fear-fight-flight state, begin to feel safer, and finally be able to imagine acceptable alternatives and even, possibly, happy endings. And the situation was still the same; I just felt differently about it.
So what I am describing is a normal reaction to trauma (potential, in my case) with hyperarousal (extreme anxiety for me) and defective problem-solving skills (didn’t think or want to use the skills I had). Having this very personal experience was an eye opener for me.
I now know I will remember this experience and be able to override the trauma-influenced resistance to using this amazing tool I have right at my fingertips. And of course, relating this understanding to my clients will, I hope, help them understand their resistance better, help them move through it more quickly, and tap away.