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Mike’s Melt Down – Dyslexic Boy Goes from Determination to Despair and Back

Mike's Melt Down - Dyslexic Boy Goes from Determination to Despair and Back

by Natalie Hill

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Dear EFT Community,

Natalie Hill writes us with this touching account of bringing a dyslexic boy back from the brink of accepting a negative fate by using EFT. Her article includes specific tapping statements and insight into aspects many dyslexic children deal with – helpful for anyone working or struggling with dyslexia!

Natalie Hill has evolved from using EFT with dyslexic kids to tapping with women entrepreneurs who want to take their business to the next level. You can find her at EFTTappingTechniques.com . If you ever get stuck, blocked or can’t finish stuff, the custom EFT script in Procrastination to Passion can help. 

– EFT Universe

Mike was doing uncharacteristically well that day. He was focused, upbeat, determined to finish. And he was at my computer – on task – typing his history report on “The Amistad.”

Then suddenly, everything fell apart.

Let me back up and give you a little background before we get to Mike’s melt down.

Dyslexia was my specialty. I was a dyslexia teacher trainer and worked privately with kids who had trouble with reading and writing. At the same time, I was an EFT Success Coach with adults. I tied the two together from time to time, but usually not as much as Mike and I would that day.

When a child has a difficulty learning to read while other kids seem to learn it easily, most struggling students draw similar conclusions. These conclusions form limiting beliefs like:

Im stupid.

I can’t learn.

There’s something wrong with me.

Other kids are better than me.

These painful and limiting beliefs are often reinforced by thoughtless or even caring language by students, teachers and parents, which make the beliefs seem more and more “true.”

I’d been working with “Mike” for three years at that point, and he’d graduated from coming to me for reading to coming to me for help with writing and completing challenging school projects.

On this day, Mike was finishing up his report on slavery in America, based on the movie The Amistad. It was due the next day, so he was especially focused and determined to get it done while in my office.

As he was typing, he suddenly remembered that he’d forgotten something at school. What he’d forgotten was a significant science assignment. It was a large poster that he’d made for the end-of-quarter project. To avoid drawing attention to it while he was in History, Mike left the poster propped outside the History classroom during class. But, after class, he forgot all about it and only remembered it hours later, school long ago out.

Mike called his sister’s cell phone to see if she was still at school and could retrieve it. He then called the school. No luck with either call. Mike was overcome with despair. He suddenly slumped down, unable to think about anything except his shame over the loss of the project he’d spent so long doing.

In this state, I knew there was zero chance of finishing his Amistad project in our 90 minutes together. I knew tapping was our only hope.

Mike was familiar with EFT, as we’d done it together many times during our years of working together. But in his current state of despair, he could not have thought of how to tap or what words to use. So I took control. 

“Mike, tap with me,” I commanded.

Sensing I was throwing him a lifeline, he looked up at me from his slump, with a flash of hope in his eyes.

“Just follow along with me,” I said as I got my hands in the Karate Chop tapping position and Mike did a limp imitation. No need to assess how bad Mike was feeling, his body posture alone indicated he was at a 10.

Now, a little aside before we get to tapping. Having worked with Mike for three years I’d come to realize that he had a deep core of shame around his belief that he was defective, stupid and inadequate (like many dyslexic students!). When this shame came up for him, Mike became listless, despondent and incapable of rational or resourceful thought. I recognized this familiar state now.

Tapping on the Karate Chop point, I said, “Even though I forgot my project and I feel so stupid and ashamed, I think maybe I’m an ok kid anyway.” Mike mumbled the repetition of my words. I allowed the mumbling, as he was clearly tuned in and on board with the tapping.

“Even though I spent all that time and I’m either going to get an F, or I’m going to have to do it again if I want to pass science, I might survive this.”

“Even though I’m such an idiot and I cannot forgive myself for leaving that poster outside the classroom, I know I did a good job on it and it would have got a good grade.”

Then we tapped through the points. It went something like this:

I’m such an idiot!
Why did I do that?
I can’t’ believe it.
I’m so ashamed of myself.
And scared.
My dad is going to be so mad.
I HAVE to turn that thing in.
I’m so stupid!
What a dumb thing to do.
And I did such a good job.
I spent so long on that poster.
I’m so mad at myself.
What an idiot I am.
I’m such an idiot.

I asked him to take a deep breath. He was already looking noticeably better, sitting up straighter, holding his head higher and looking me more directly in the eye.

“How are you doing?” I asked. “OK,” he shrugged. Still not willing to open up.

Back to tapping.

OK, I did it.
It’s done.
Yep, I’m ashamed of myself.
And a little scared of what my dad will say.
And mad at myself.
I still feel all that.
I wonder if there’s any way to look at this that could make me feel a little better?
I guess I do have a choice here.
I could just not turn it in and get an F. (Mike shook his head)
No, I’m not doing that.
I could do it again tonight. (Ugh, he slumped again)
Since I did the poster once I could do it again
And it might even be easier this time.
What if I could see myself as smart for doing such a great job on the science project?
What if I could remember how smart and creative I am in science?
I bet since I already did this poster once, I can do it again, even more quickly.
It will probably turn out even better this time.
With everything I learned doing it the first time.
My dad’s been mad before.
He gets over it quickly.

“Take a deep breath,”  I directed. “Now, help me think of some ways you’re a smart and talented and good person,” I suggested.

We continued tapping.

Me: You’re great at science.
Mike: I’m pretty good at science.
Mike: I’m a good cook.
Me: You’re an amazing cook. (Mike was smiling now.)
Mike: People laugh at my jokes.
Me: You’ve got a great sense of humor.
Mike: I’m good at math.
Me: You’re terrific at inventing things.
Mike: Yes, I’m a pretty good inventor.
Me: People like you.
Mike: They say I’m fun to be around.
Me: You’re a really nice person.
Mike: Maybe this will be ok.
Me: This will be ok.
Me: You can easily turn this situation around.
Mike: It’s actually not that big of a deal. I’ll do it again tonight and do an even better job.

During the whole course of the tapping, I watched Mike transform. He inched up straighter and taller, his facial expression softening, relaxing. His voice got louder and more sure-sounding.

I never asked him to assess his number – with kids it’s usually quite obvious. And the real proof? He turned immediately from the tapping and got back to work on his history paper, sitting up straight with his focus on the Amistad again.

No discussion needed.

I couldn’t help but mention to Mike, as he typed with his back to me, how effective EFT can be at getting us back on track when we get emotionally derailed. I know he believes me, he’d just lived the proof. But I’m not sure Mike will soon be thinking of doing tapping on his own.

Teaching Mission in Haiti

Teaching Mission in Haiti

by Claudie Caufour, President of Energy Psy sans Frontières

Part 1

If Haiti Had Told Me

Haiti, ultimately, it is the story of a succession of painful emotions.

When Sister Fenna speaks, a smile finally escapes between tears as she says coyly “You remember things so far?”

This woman of 76 years whose beauty dazzles all the space, light blue eyes as bright as her person as she tells her country’s story — its history, its evolution, its decline and yet hopeful look. “Haitians are not people who think about suicide. We love life, we dance, music, art … but it’s not going to kill the germs that the Haitians have.”

There would have been a time when the climate was quite secure. In a laugh, she said that it had to be the time when she was too little to remember. Her father said that he climbed the hills on horseback. When night fell, he unsaddled his horse to use this seat as a pillow. He fell asleep peacefully in nature.

Unimaginable now.

No later than yesterday, a man was attacked in this residential area. A gang of youths had completely stripped him. “He was lucky, he came away with his life,” which does not seem to flow naturally, even when we give everything we have. A kind of Russian roulette, or is the one that pulls the trigger, the toss of a multi-traumatized people including a large part of the population is separated, cut entirely from their emotions.

From this point of view, death is a state that opposes the state of living. But under these conditions, where every day is a question, a struggle for survival, eventually death may seem a relaxing alternative.

Health.

That would be the key to everything here in Haiti and elsewhere. Physical health, but also mental health, she tells us. Here, you have a lot of work to do. A transmission job, but also for sustainability, a way to give truly without promise superfluous given the means to get better, to bring a bit of humanity in this country marked both by successive political events that have economically devastated Haiti and disasters that tackle the country when it attempts a weak draft to rise.

Modestly, I come to believe in listening: and if we were in the right pass, EFT, the transmit and Remap … Just let it go. Because she says, “we would find guilt to believe that thinking holds the solutions for Haiti.”

It would be demeaning and unsuitable, disempowering.

Live from Haiti Friday, June 28 morning

We return to the main hospital in Port-au-Prince. Twenty nurses and doctors waiting for us to take the training in EFT / Remap.

It’s time that things fall into place … we expect in the corridors of service a new birth, in which we conducted treatment sessions yesterday.

The mom that Yves Wauthier and I saw yesterday in consultation walks by in the hallway. She is unrecognizable. Yesterday, she was dejected, a lack of care made her look like her body folded on itself. But today, her body has a girlish voice, an almost inaudible questioned about her mental state. Today, this mom’s hair was combed and her outfit betrayed that something had changed in her determination not to let go. Her approach was more safe and voluntary, her smile was not wrong when she saw me in the hallways. We exchanged a few words in which she talked about her baby in terms of hope.

This is a mom like any moms in front of me. I’m terribly excited.

We arrive in the breakfast room for training.

Obviously, in this ongoing emergency, time is running out: we monopolize many caregivers and the long hours jeopardize the conduct of their service. Jean-Michel and Yves have a plan very suited to their practice and the nature of the stress they face in the hospital service training.

The interest is palpable. The training began with the viewing of the film directed by IFPEC associations and Psy Energy Without Borders after our first training mission. Buy in is immediate. Undoubtedly these caregivers are precursors in Haiti to adopt these easy techniques to use. In this sense, they will swell the ranks of caregivers in the world who look at the whole person and relieve pain by relying on individual inner resources to unpack the traumatic impact.

Roadbook

By Yves Wauthier (Acep’s Belgium coordinator and chairman of the APEC www.energypsy.eu)

First day quite emotional:

I arrived this morning at the General Hospital of Haiti in the neonatal ward. We accompanied several people whose story is very touching. Then we went to meet a lady who takes care of an orphanage to collect her testimony (Sister Fenna). Tomorrow, we will give training in stress management to deal with emergency situations for the hospital staff, the babies or their families. There are clearly situations where working on inner resources makes no sense in taking people’s faith themselves or their fierce determination to fight for them and not for poor children.

I have personally followed, with Claudie Caufour, a lady suffering from syphilis who has five children to feed (three from her late husband and two of her own). She has to choose either to pay for the neonatal medicine her baby needs (28 weeks), or to pay for her own medicine (which she needs if she is to sell used clothes to earn money to feed her children), or to pay rent (rented land on which she could build a hut made of recovered carpets, fabrics, etc.) so she won’t fear for their life or health when it rains.

Her ultimate fear is survival and the question of what would happen to the children if she disappeared.

This is far from unique, but it gives meaning to the request made by a training institution caring for students studying psychology or that this service neonatal and pediatric.

Our application is to teach them how to use simple EFT techniques as integrative relief tools. The mother told us after the session she felt more courage. Coming from a person who is certainly not lacking in courage in light of the conditions of life there, we must salute her. It makes us feel very small and well off when we complain about trifles. This day dedicated to the training of the personnel of the department of neonatology helped me to put our “worries” in perspective. Beautiful late evening or early night!

The day ended for us with intact emotions.

We first gave an approach to EFT and REMAP to a team of 20 people from the general hospital in Point-a-Pitre service neonatal and pediatric (doctors, nurses) and we continued with a speech and tapping with orphans. Their need for love was so great that we literally had clusters of children surrounding us. Children who simply needed to be touched, heard and watched. Our hearts exploded with how they needed love. We could also facilitate this link using the Tapping Bear as facilitator and transference object. The smiles of the children were so beautiful and so spontaneous that we more or less transmit this energy of love, even though I’m sure you feel it deep inside you!

Tomorrow we’ll be back because some of these children had not spoken since the earthquake three years ago! and we want to continue this work to reconnect. So fruitful and useful, I got my suitcase and finally wondered if they will allow me to give these various teams the teaching materials I had brought for them. These are, therefore, not easy days but they are unforgettable days!

I hope that you can engage with us, volunteer to come participate. In my eyes, it is not only the culmination of a dream, where some live a nightmare, but also a necessity, solidarity, an expression of humanism that moves us forward in life. Because, unlike those hearts that we help, we can personally make a difference in less than 5 days, and then we go back to Europe!

This may seem to be a cliché, but I think you might just realize that this investment of time and heart is one of the greatest gifts we can give to you all. See you tomorrow!

It’s the first of four days of training for the psychology students. Rarely have I seen a group of students as eager to gain knowledge and learning. Nearly 90 people were present and hyper motivated. All subjects were obviously sensitive and we were quickly confronted with that reality. How to teach a tool in its depths while avoiding the pitfalls of reality. Nothing is simple in Haiti. Their trauma is daily. During the first year, a student called me because the caregiver was a bit blocked.

We had just to show the points and said something to the day staff. The staff tells me that the morning after the training he saw someone get shot. I think he attended a performance and I realized that it does not hold water.

I asked him if he saw someone being gunned down by the government or if he saw bandits. They were bandits who carried a person in front of him in the street. The tone was set … a few rounds of tapping to calm everything and reconnect the person with his resources and that incident was retired.

Right after that, another student called me and I realized that she was nearly burned alive with gasoline by her schizophrenic mother 7 years ago.

We realize that we need to change our training plan to help stabilize quickly and in good working order which inevitably brings exchanges and questions that are very relevant and show an understanding and integration of elements to take into account to make a good therapy. I feel personally very excited because this is clearly one of the best groups I have been training.

Nothing trivial, nothing played.

Pure and harsh reality and the equally strong need to learn to do more than survive, but to live and to help others. It is simply magical moments.

Thanks to Claude, Anne and Jean-Michel but above all these students for their total commitment. Tomorrow we will start working with children aged 4 and 8 years who lost their fathers during the earthquake and who have developed a range of behavioral disorders (OCD and tic) because tomorrow is Father’s Day in Haiti! 

Part 2

Second Day of Training: Still With 90 Psychologists from Haiti

Roadbook

We gave training that recalls concepts taught the previous day. We prepared targets and began to put them to work with EFT. We first recall that all that happens during training must remain internal training and we also remember that it is better that they choose medium targets.

In Haiti, it is certainly not the easiest!

I return to work in a demonstration with a little princess 9 years old creating a bond with her gently and respectfully, causing her to speak with one of the activation topics: trouble she has had in school with some students. But beyond that, the real subject is the death of her father during the earthquake and the inability of her mother to even talk just yet about the father.

The link is so important that I take the opportunity to juggle an imitation of Donald Duck as a joke to defuse the non reaction when the teacher does not intervene, and the guilt she feels when children cry. It is clear that this only hides suffering, and we need to link this and recognize that it is in the child victim or executioner. IL is suffering and I recognized that free fall of negative emotions and blockages of the little princess!

This session addresses this activation and allowed Jean-Michel Gurret to string thereafter (and special) session on the real problem. This session also allowed me to make a treatment plan for children and to answer a series of questions on the management of children in domestic service! Children in domestic service are children abducted from their family or have no family, and they serve as slaves in their “adoptive” families.

They spend their days washing, cleaning, ironing so much so that one of our participants said that they did not even know how to play. They do not know any games and it is very difficult to reintegrate them into the education system because they have a lack of confidence and a totally devalued self-image and no resources!

I spend time explaining the brain gym routine and energy to restore databases to their ability to learn what will work on their Self and self-esteem before we can address the trauma and repeated rape and abuse. Heavy!

Besides that, we continue to review how to establish a treatment plan, a planned session and ultimately how to work effectively on a single trauma and complex trauma. I will also explain the basics of stabilization and therapies ego state which is a gateway to the reprocessing complex traumas. The explanation of the first four REMAP points and reframing consolidates all 5 points. Tomorrow, July 1, we start with a demo showing all these notions.

Targeting the Session EFT and REMAP

One of the issues also fell on how to manage people strongly in the mind. Classic questioning brings us back to the importance of the therapeutic relationship and the therapeutic alliance. I took the opportunity to do two demos for 15 minutes about EFT, the results follow and everyone observed the phase connection to emotions and sensations (caused by acceleration of tapping and verbalization – with mounted in one patient with a “but … stop!” angry enough, a second phase of desensitization juggling the pace of tapping into the slowing while cropping in 5 points and finally yet another round of resources.

Result: The patient himself admits spontaneously that he no longer feels able to store and easy to see even.

Demonstration made reprocessing information…

In short, a long day that perfectly illustrated that he can quickly change a belief system and free himself for a better quality of life. A lot of emotions and then tomorrow we will take all this with a more specific work on resources, the Self and the reconstruction of our internal quality.

Thanks to all and see you tomorrow!

Part 3

Third Day of Training

Roadbook

The day began with a demonstration showing the theoretical elements seen in previous days: Targeting, treatment plan and session.

The patient has a phobia that she says was born from a recurring nightmare that began six months ago. It is a dream that comes every two to three weeks and involves an accident of a blue bus that she lives through (public transportation in Haiti with tap tap also). I ask her if something special happened in the previous release of the first year these nightmares, the patient immediately returns to a narrowly averted bus accident. So we start with words and recall the words of the patient.

I take this opportunity to explain that we can bind to both the event and the nightmares while making the rounds of tapping.

During the round, it appears that since this event was narrowly avoided by this young woman we dare not take the bus alone, but as if it is accompanied by friends. We insert this new aspect in the rounds of tapping, while continuing to stimulate points on the roots out. In 40 minutes, we eliminate her phobia and also take the opportunity to stabilize another event that resurfaced during desensitation!

Namely, an attack she suffered last week when she was attacked by two armed men. So there was a common link between these two events: the insecurity and having narrowly escaped death in both incidents. I simply stabilized by stimulating the first four points REMAP and pacification in silence. I suggest to the patient to leave it in a container until she’s more at ease before doing another session. This new incident is different from a phobia of buses.

After a few clarifying questions on the session, we kick off with the installation of REMAP resources to help them prepare for, at least, stabilizing the complex trauma and to prepare the restatement. In fact, we had to adapt our training plan in Haiti because there is almost no single trauma!

Guerda comes with hypersensitivity and explained that she cries when she is rebuffed, frustrated, experiences injustice, etc. In search of basic events, I notice that we are dealing with a child who has not had a father, had a hyper protective mother and brothers and sisters who “hunted” as soon as she bothered them. We clearly have a big attachment disorder on a hypersensitive child. I take this opportunity to explain the tilting and actually locate useful to counteract the blocking belief and negative cognition resource.

The lack of self-confidence and especially the injustice she felt … We found a time when she was able to hold her emotions at bay because she knew she had given everything she could in the event in question despite criticism! We strengthen this resource and move to trigger this (which was an incident where a manager told her to go get something to eat in another room and another had denied her entry claiming that it was now reserved for children.

Instantaneous tripping with tears at the thought! We calmed her by stimulating dots and REMAP repassons strengthening the resource stage and vice versa and so on. In 25 minutes, Guerda laughs and thinking back to the various events, she remains calm and smiling. So we were able to start and strengthen a useful resource for power, once we had verified that it holds well, back in the past to disable all events that could still obstruct its release.

We continue the day with the implementation of this system resources and tilting. Tomorrow, we will show the staff how to handle this group because many of our participants have follow up groups as children as domestic servants.

For the record, these are children who have experienced trauma in addition to virtual slavery for many years and are often illiterate and completely unable to remember or even play because they have never done so!

11-Month Headache Vanishes with EFT Tapping

EFT for the Highly Sensitive Temperament
Dear EFT Community,

EFT practitioner Mara Protas takes you step-by-step through an intricate headache case that was resolved by applying EFT.

-EFT Universe


By Mara Protas

I wanted to share with you and your readers another story of someone who was in intractable pain (headache) for 11 months, despite medical interventions.

As you can see from her email below, she had been to numerous doctors and therapists, taken medications which made her gain weight and lose her hair, and only found relief after using EFT to deal with the emotional issues associated with the circumstances of her daughter’s birth.

Teri was referred to me by her grandmother, who is a friend of my mom’s. She had no knowledge of EFT and we were working by phone.

I had asked Teri to write about her experience to share with you and your readers.

Here is her email, followed by some specifics of what we worked on:

Hi Mara,

You can use my real name–Teri Tibbetts.

I had been experiencing a severe headache since the birth of my first child 11 months ago. I had an emergency C-section due to receiving an infection while in labor and getting a high fever. The pain was taking its toll on me, not only physically, but also emotionally. I felt as though my quality of life was disintegrating.

I tried physical therapy, acupuncture, and hypnosis. I saw numerous neurologists and was prescribed many different types of medication. Nothing was working for me and I was starting to lose hope that I would ever feel better again.

Then I tried EFT. I couldn’t believe how fast it started working! My headache completely went away the first time I tried it! When I looked back at the birth of my child, the experience was dark, sad, and painful and I was bitter toward the doctor who gave me the infection.

After using EFT, I looked back at the birth of my daughter and there was light, love, and joy–amazing! I was able to let go of the anger toward the doctor that I blamed for my pain and headache. EFT truly was a life-saving experience for me. It lifted the pain and sadness off my shoulders and replaced it with hope. EFT was a wonderful positive healing experience.

I would highly recommend EFT, and plan on continuing to use the techniques I was taught.

Teri

In the course of an hour, we worked on several issues. We started by working on the pain of the headache, which was a 4 out of 10 at the time. This gave me the chance to coach her through the EFT process. The pain decreased to a 2 after the first round and stayed there despite subsequent rounds for the pain. So we started to work on the emotional issues.

Here are some of the things we worked on:

Even though I have anger at doctor for giving me the infection, I deeply and completely accept myself.

Even though I am tired of living with this pain and nothing seems to be working, I deeply and completely accept myself.

Even though I’m angry that no one listened to me about my symptoms and maybe they could have prevented this, I deeply and completely accept myself.

Even though the doctors didn’t care and didn’t come back to see me, (Her own physician didn’t come to see her and she never had one doctor who came to see her more than once.) I deeply and completely accept myself.

Even though I’m afraid I will never be pain free again, I deeply and completely accept myself.

Even though I am afraid to believe that the pain will go away and not come back, I deeply and completely accept myself.

Even though I feel hopeless, I deeply and completely accept myself.

Even though the doctors don’t know what they are doing and can’t tell me what is wrong, they were probably as frustrated as me and were doing the best they could, given their training.

We also did the Movie Technique for her experience after the C-section of her arms being tied down (to prevent injury from the IVs), shaking, in pain, feverish, the darkness, and the feelings of helplessness. We also used the Choice statements to remember this with joy and light instead of darkness and anger. After this, she was able to see that scene in light with curtains open and feel joy.

One of her neurologists gave her a medication that is no longer recommended and caused complications, and another gave her a medication that caused her hair to fall out.

We tapped for the anger about that:

Even though I’m so angry at her (the doctor) and she isn’t even aware of it, it is hurting me instead, (This was a biggie.) I deeply and completely accept myself.

Teri’s daughter has developmental problems attributed to the infection.

So we tapped for:

Even though I am so sad and angry that she has to go through this, I deeply and completely accept myself.

Even though I worry about what Sophia’s life will be like and I want to prevent her from being teased by other kids, as I deeply and completely myself.

Even though I’m angry that I have had to spend all this money on this that I could have been spending on fun and happy things, I deeply and completely accept myself.

Teri’s headache disappeared early in the session.

I communicated with her via email a few days later and she told me: “My headache, however, is back. It went away for about a day and half. That is a REALLY BIG DEAL that it went away for that long! I’m in the process of reading the manual very carefully so that I can continue to heal myself.”

Note that Teri didn’t use EFT for her headache right away when it reappeared. This is puzzling behavior on the part of some EFT clients and is not at all unusual.

However, when I subsequently asked her about whether or not she resumed tapping, she said: “Yes, my headaches are still much better–yea! I am using EFT and it is working wonders. I had a neurology appointment today and told my doctor that I want to stop taking my headache medicine because I feel so much better. He agreed!”

Reducing Stress in Kids is Easy with EFT Tapping

Reducing Stress in Kids Is Easy with EFT Tapping

by Jackie Viramontez

I first taught EFT with my son when he was 8-years-old during summer baseball league. He’d often have a stomachache and general malaise before his games even though he desperately wanted to play.

During the games he’d often become overheated and nauseous. Once he even threw up. I’d attributed the nausea to his heat sensitivity but the more it happened, the more it looked like anxiety. We began to use EFT before games towards the end of the season which greatly reduced the stomachache and nausea. Heat sensitivity seems to run in my family.

When the other issues were taken care of with EFT tapping, the heat sensitivity became more manageable.

When basketball season came along, “Adam” (at that time, age 9) was again having a his anxiety symptoms before games. Again, we used EFT with good results, even better than during summer baseball season. I think that was both because we were more practiced at figuring out the words that worked the best for the treatments (Adam was more able to identify his feelings) and the heat was no longer a factor.

I remember one Saturday in particular because of two problems.

He had a basketball game AND he was to spend the night with a good friend (which he had not done much with to date). He was very anxious so we spent about 20 minutes doing various EFT treatments both for the basketball game and the spending the night away from home.

At the end of the 20 minutes he was like a different child. He was full of energy, excited, and free from stomachache and other anxiety symptoms. I can’t tell you how relieved I was, not only for that particular day but also that there was clearly hope for my child to have a less stressful life.

Then we moved to a new house. Adam woke up every night after my husband and I had gone to bed and crept down the hall to get in bed with us. We never heard him and this arrangement was fine with us. We had had a family bed with each of our children, sometimes more than one at a time, until they were ready to stay in their own beds. However, in our new house the floors creaked badly and we woke up every time he came in. Also, he was more restless which meant none of us slept well.

We decided it was time to make a change.

Adam was not happy about it, but made the adjustment for a couple of weeks. Then he started to wake up from bad dreams. We talked about them and treated for them but that wasn’t enough. He was still scared and couldn’t get back to sleep for hours sometimes.

Finally, my husband realized in talking with him that Adam was feeling insecure about the safety in this new house. He explained how this house was safe and that seemed to help a lot. However, he continued to wake in the night and be awake for a couple of hours. He wasn’t scared but he couldn’t go back to sleep and he couldn’t identify what to treat himself for. We even tried treating for something that he couldn’t identify but with no luck.

One night while I was sitting with him, I had this overwhelming intuition that he was lonely at night. I asked him and he started crying and said yes that he was. After giving him some time to really feel that and get some comfort from me, we decided to try tapping for being lonely. It was like magic!

Afterwards we began to see that using EFT regularly before bed and treating the chronic issues each night meant that we all got a good night’s sleep. He can occasionally skip a night, but if he skips more that a couple of nights he wakes up again.

What has been most amazing to me is watching my now 10-year-old son learn to identify his feelings with such clarity, see his dedication to himself, and his commitment to do his EFT tapping. He knows when he needs to tap for himself in other situations and even suggests it to others when he senses their stress.

Things seemed fine for a long while, but about two weeks ago he began waking in the night on a regular basis again, not scared but unable to go back to sleep for hours. He was having headaches which kept him awake also. We suspect he may need glasses so we’ve made an eye exam appointment.

Three nights ago I had another strong intuition and had Adam use his old method of EFT treatments. He slept all night. Again the next night he used EFT and again slept all night. Last night he woke once but was able to go right back to sleep and slept the rest of the night.

We are all sleeping again.

I know EFT has helped Adam to have a less stressful life, which affects not only him, but the rest of us as well. He is going to grow up completely in tune with himself.

EFT for When You Are Stuck in Traffic and Need to Pee

Clinical EFT Handbook Volume 1 by Dawson Church
Dear EFT Community,

Here is a funny example of the instruction to “try EFT tapping for any situation.” Christina Elvin from the UK was stuck in traffic, had to pee, but there was no way she could get to a bathroom. She used EFT to “hold on” for an hour and a half. Talk about the power of EFT!

-Stephanie M


By Christina Elvin

I was on my way to delivering an EFT presentation at a Healthy Living event. The event was only 110 miles away, a mere 2.5 hours drive, and all motorway/dual carriageway, so a very relaxed drive. At least, so I thought.

After about 90 miles, I realized I needed to have a pee.

As I pride myself on being able to “hold my own,” I felt I could hold on for the hotel easily, so didn’t stop at the next services (gas stations) coming up. After all, I was only 20 miles away from my hotel.

In 20 minutes I’d be okay.

Little did I know that there were major roadworks approaching, an boy, were they major! Within five miles the traffic slowed up, within another mile it was at a standstill. We were moving at less than 10 miles per hour, stop-start-stop-start.

I was beginning to get desperate.

Normally, I can hold on for about 20 minutes comfortably. We’d covered eight miles in 45 minutes. No end in sight. Those blue porta-loos that the workmen used looked so inviting–dare I stop the car and use them? Nope–as the traffic was single lane, it wasn’t a good idea.

So I did EFT tapping on:

“Even though I desperately want to pee, I can hold on.”

“Even though I can’t control the traffic, I can control my bladder.”

Success! My thoughts moved away from the blue porta-loos; my thoughts were miles away. I was singing aloud to my Beatles’ tapes, window turned down, a lovely hot day outside, bright blue sky, wonderful; after all, I wasn’t in a hurry to get there, I had plenty of time.

Then a vehicle in front broke down down, probably overheated, slowed me down even more. Eventually, after another 30 minutes, the traffic speed quickened and we moved on. Three miles later it was my turn off the motorway and I had to find my way to the hotel, which was only three miles from the motorway. I made it–just in time.

I’d held on for 90 minutes in all. A normal 2.5-hour journey took me four hours. Thanks to EFT tapping, I managed to “hold my own.”

2 Recurring Dreams Healed with EFT Tapping

dream to freedom book by hoss
Dear EFT Community,

Scary recurring dreams are very difficult to deal with. They often cause anxiety simply because of the possibility of them interfering with sleep. This article by EFT Practitioner and author, Aileen Nobles discusses her work with two different recurring dreams and EFTs potential for healing our dreams.

-Dawson Church


By Aileen Nobles

When Jane came into the office she told me she had been plagued for years with two reoccurring nightmares. She was depressed, had heart palpitations and suffered from the occasional panic attack.

She desperately wanted to stop having two dreams that really upset her.

The first dream was a toilet dream.

She constantly found herself needing to have a bowel movement, yet every toilet she found was backed up, overflowing and filthy. She would desperately run from toilet to toilet, finding the same situation wherever she went. Her desperation to relieve herself grew in intensity, until she would wake up in a sweat with heart palpitations.

The second dream was a nightmare as far as she was concerned.

She would find herself walking along a road, when she would notice she was being stalked by someone in dark clothes who looked like a “foreigner.”

She would run, and he would run with her, hiding behind bushes and buildings. She tried to hide but she would hear him coming and start running again trying to escape. Finally she would wake up, again sweating and experiencing heart palpitations.

In her own life “Jane” had been very passive. Her husband of many years was very clever with words. He had a way of blaming her and putting her down about anything that wasn’t running smoothly in their family life.

Jane never spoke up. She swallowed her pain and anger year after year. She started to feel more and more depressed and began having panic attacks and palpitations.

As our session began Jane requested that we start tapping on her toilet dreams, even though I would have chosen to first focus on her fear of speaking up, and the suppressed pain and anger. It was okay, as all roads lead to Mecca.

She began gently rubbing her sore spots:

“Even though I have these disgusting and upsetting dreams, its okay, I’m still a terrific person anyway.”

“Even though these dreams are trying to tell me something and I’m not listening, its ok, I’m still a pretty great person.

We started on the basic tapping:

“I have carried a lot of garbage inside me that i’ve stuffed over the years, by not speaking up.”

“All this garbage wants to come out, and it deserves to go down the toilet,”

“Perhaps my toilets are overflowing because I haven’t released any of my stuff.”

“My subconscious and Higher Self are showing me that I need to release this garbage but I can’t seem to do it.”

“When I try and find a place to relieve myself, its always overflowing, I desperately need to go, and I cant, and I feel panic.”

“I see that my need to release all I have inside is essential.”

“The stopped up toilets are a mirror of how I am inside.”

“I’m ready to release all my anger and pain, and honor myself by speaking up.”

“I dont need to have these stuffed up toilet dreams anymore as I release my pent up emotions.”

We talked about letting her husband know how she felt. She decided that she didn’t deserve to be spoken to in that tone of voice, and wouldn’t accept being blamed anymore.

I had her imagine herself speaking up to him quite calmly, as she tapped on her gamut point. It felt natural and easy to her. We tapped on releasing old hurts and put downs, until she felt clear of
any buried emotions.

She tapped another basic round of:

“If I need to have any more toilet dreams the toilets will be clean and clear for me as I continue to release all my garbage that I have stuffed inside.”

“I am now able to speak up and honor myself in a loving and centered way.”

“It feels good to express myself , I deserve it.”

“As I express myself, I no longer need to experience heart palpitations. My heart and my love are becoming stronger right now.”

We tested Jane with kinesology (muscle testing), and she was strong on choosing, allowing, and deserving. If any of these had tested weak we would have continued to tap on not allowing or not deserving. In my experience its essential to have agreement on all levels of our Being with allowing and deserving.

Next we moved to her “nightmare of being stalked and chased.”

I explained to Jane that any dark person chasing us or threatening us in any way in a dream, is nothing more than an aspect of ourselves that we have not yet bought into the Light.

I had Jane begin by rubbing her sore spots:

“Even though these dreams of someone stalking me are terrifying, perhaps in some way they are trying to help me, and whatever they are trying to tell me, I can love and accept myself anyway.”

We did a couple of basic rounds:

“This feeling of being stalked terrifies me.”

“This person feels so dark and scary.”

“What if this dark and scary person is a dark part of me I havnt looked at.”

“What if this dark and scary person needs help.”

“Perhaps this scary part really is a part of me.”

“What if I acknowledge the parts of myself that so far I have chosen to keep in the dark.”

“Perhaps I will let all my anger come to the surface and release it.”

We tapped using the long version.

When she reached her little finger as she tapped on the cuticle she said:

“I forgive myself for all my terrible thoughts I have had about my husband that I stuffed inside. I forgive myself and my husband for our behavior and for contributing in any way to creating this pain inside of me.”

We went to the Karate Chop point:

“I understand my husband did the best he could coming from his limited male perspective.”

“I know he loves me.”

“If he was blessed with my sensitivity, he would have behaved differently, but he chose to be himself.”

“I needed him to be who I wanted him to be, how dare he behave the way he wanted to, instead of the way I wanted him to.”

“What right does he have to do it his way?”

She began to laugh.

Tapping on the sore spot:

“Even though there were times when I wanted to strangle him, its ok, I can love and accept myself anyway.”

She hadn’t mentioned these thoughts to me, but admitted afterwards that she had periodically had them.)

Long sequence:

“I can now release all my guilt at myself for the thoughts I had. I no longer need to stuff my emotions, I am ready to speak up.”

“I’m really terrific, and our marriage will now improve.”

“Now I have released my anger, I can open my heart and allow myself to feel more loving toward my husband.”

“Life will only get better.”

“I am ready now. No more scary dreams. I dont need them any more.”

Joan had shut herself down sexually over the years. She used the excuse of menopause being the reason instead of suppressed anger.

It was wonderful to receive her call a week later and hear that she had had no more dreams of being stalked. She did have a toilet dream where she found a clean and functioning toilet.

She is now feeling as playful and sensual as she did when she and her husband first got married. Jane has had no palpitations or panic attacks since our last session.

Dreams are always our friends ,and if they seem scary, once interpreted the issues we need to release will free us from the need to experience guidance in this form. EFT offers the quickest way I have ever come across that allows us to utilize the information we are being given in our dream-state to release and grow.

EFT Tapping Helps Resist the Urge to Stay in Bed all Day

EFT for Fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue


By Karen Degen, Certified EFT Practitioner

It was not unusual for my client “Sarah” to still be in bed after 9.30 a.m. on a workday. When she came to see me she claimed that she needed a lot of sleep and was tired all of the time. She confessed that she didn’t always sleep well and she felt this was the reason why she had trouble getting out of bed in the morning.

Sarah had a school-age child, but her partner was the one who got her breakfast and off to school while Sarah snoozed on. She knew that successful people get up early in the morning and she felt lazy. In her business, Sarah often didn’t make calls to prospective clients that should have been made and she often used the excuse that she never had enough time in her day.

As we talked through her sleeping problem, we identified a secondary gain that she would have more time to be rejected by clients and more time for things to go wrong if she started her workday at an earlier time.

Sarah’s mother was an alcoholic and when Sarah was young her mother would still be in bed when she left for school in the morning. Her mother would still be in bed when Sarah returned home from school in the afternoon. There would always be a long list of chores waiting for Sarah as soon as she walked in the door. It seemed to Sarah that the only thing her mother did was stay in bed all day and come up with a exhaustive list of chores for Sarah to do, rather than get out of bed and do them herself.

We had worked on some of the issues around her mother earlier sessions, but we addressed the staying-in-bed-all-day part during a session.

The EFT Setup statements used:

Even though mom stayed in bed all day, and I hated that, I deeply and completely accept myself.

Even though I’m lazy and I can’t get up early, I deeply and completely accept and forgive myself.

Even though I wasn’t allowed to rebel as a teenager and I’m rebelling now, I deeply and completely accept and forgive myself.

Even though I need lots of sleep and it’s in my genes, I have to have it, I deeply and completely accept myself.

Even though I am not disciplined and I don’t want to get out of bed at 7:00 a.m., I deeply and completely accept myself.

Even though getting up at 7:00 a.m. will mean more time to be rejected and more time for things to go wrong at work, I deeply and completely accept myself.

We tapped through specific events with Sarah and her mother; on her feelings seeing her mother still in bed in the afternoon, and on being left a list of chores to complete. We tapped until her emotions were released. As with any specific event, I was checking Sarah’s SUD Level of Intensity throughout our tapping.

At the end of the session I checked Sarah’s beliefs about wanting to stay in bed, and how she felt emotionally. The belief that the world is is a placed to be rejected had changed to her world is a safe place, and her life is OK. I asked her for her to score herself again on her SUD Level of Intensity regarding her feeling lazy, and she gave herself an 1 out of 10.

We continued to tap on aspects around staying in bed until I felt we had made a significant change in her anxiety level around wanting to sleep all day. But how successful we were would be revealed in the weeks that followed.

I received the following email from Sarah 6 weeks later:

You and I rock! I wake up around 7:00 a.m. every morning like magic. Sometimes I am straight up, other times I have breakfast and first watch the TV news. But it is very very rare that I am not at the computer starting my work by 8:30 a.m.

How EFT works is beyond me, but it does work!

EFT Hastens Recovery from Concussion and Skull Fracture

The EFT Manual by Dawson Church 143x200


By Tania de Winne, MD

Onna, my 1.5-year-old girl, fell from her high chair on September 8 at dinnertime. She went straight with her head onto the tile floor. At first she cried her lungs out, then she became drowsy and sleepy, refusing all food and drink (even though she hadn’t eaten yet). There was no immediate swelling noticeable on her head, her pupils stayed symmetrical, and she didn’t bleed from her ears.

She slept sitting up straight on my lap for about 2 hours. Because I was holding her, I could only surrogate tap for her in my mind, which I did. I tapped for “this terrible headache,” “my concussed brains,” “dizziness,” “I want my brains to heal rapidly for a 100% recovery.”

She woke up and started playing as if nothing had happened. But she still refused to eat or drink. Normally, she’s a very active kid, needing very little sleep, but now she became sleepy again within 1.5 hours. Because it was near her bedtime, I tucked her in, bracing myself for a night of getting up every hour to check her vital signs. It was her waking me up every hour during that night crying and reassuring me that way that she was “only” concussed and didn’t have any hemorrhaging in her brain. I surrogate tapped through the night for her and the next morning she was alert and active and hungry as ever. Instead of only needing an afternoon nap of about an hour, she needed a morning and an afternoon nap of about 2 hours each, indicating that she still hadn’t recovered fully from her fall, but, hey, I could live with that. By September 11, she still needed 2 hours’ rest during the day instead of 1, but I could leave for the day with a peaceful mind.

The next day, however, my husband phoned to tell me he had felt a huge sponge-like swelling on the left side of her head and he had X rays and a CAT scan taken (on Sept. 13) showing a large fracture of the parietal bone of her skull, ending just before the left temporal artery and a massive hematoma underneath the skin.

Such a type of fracture normally takes 6 weeks to heal and is even notorious for not healing at all. I kept on surrogate tapping for her: “I command my tissues to readily absorb this blood and fluid,” “I command my bone cells to form new bone tissue and close the gap,” “I accept myself totally and unconditionally with this swelling and this fracture.” By September 20, the swelling had vanished overnight. According to the neurosurgeon, this also indicated that the fracture must be healing as well. Because we didn’t want to expose her unnecessarily to X rays, the control X ray was scheduled for the 4th week (instead of the 6th) to see if EFT had sped up the healing of the fracture (as it had when I broke my toe).

Conclusion: the concussion cleared in 5 days instead of in a fortnight, without her needing to be kept hospitalized and quiet in a darkened room all the time. Thank you, EFT.

The large swelling disappeared in 10 days (without medication or ointments or needle puncture).

And what about the fracture?

A control X ray taken precisely 4 weeks after the traumatic fall shows that the fracture didn’t enlarge (endangering severage of the large artery mentioned above) and that it is healing normally. Maybe EFT didn’t speed up the closure of the fracture (or did it?). It did start the healing process of a fracture notorious for not healing at all and it definitely improved the symptoms of a severe concussion in a remarkably short period of time.

Using EFT Tapping to Release the Decision to be Miserable

Using EFT Tapping to Release the Decision to be Miserable

by Angie Muccillo

Dear EFT Community,

As Angie Muccillo was doing some generalized tapping with her client, an important core issue appeared. The client had a very significant memory of herself as a child where she distinctly remembered making a decision “to be miserable.” She was still hanging on to the past, despite wanting very much to move on. Read how EFT helped Angie’s client release the pain of her past and the misery she had been carrying with her throughout her life.

– EFT Universe

I recently had an EFT session with a woman who has suffered anxiety and depression since her childhood shortly after her father committed suicide.

Naturally this is a tragic, deeply traumatic and sad event in any child’s life. She has consequently had years of therapy and whilst she can talk about her father’s death now, it took a very long time before she could do so. At the time, due to the level of grief and overwhelm experienced by her mother and family, no-one ever talked about what happened or comforted her in any way.

All she remembers is feeling so completely alone, scared and with a constant aching sadness in her heart.

After her dad’s death she was always sent to school early and remembers sitting and crying alone and in fear behind the shelter sheds. The family’s grief was so deep and their ability to function normally so severely impaired that her needs for comfort and support were not able to be met by her immediate family.

After tapping on several issues around her father’s death, including how she felt as a child and other issues currently keeping her stuck in her life, she became saddened by the realization that so much of her life has been consumed by this.

She was still hanging on to the past, despite wanting very much to move on.

So at this point we tapped on:

Even though part of me is still hanging on to the past…

Even though I’m so sad that this has consumed so much of my life that I don’t even know what it’s like not to have it…

Even though I’ve not had the career, the family, the life I wanted because of this…

Even though if I give up the past now I won’t know where I’ll be, who I am or where to go, I choose to focus on my personal vision of peace (which she described earlier, as the life she wanted).

As she tapped on this, a very significant memory of herself as a child popped into her head. She distinctly remembered making a decision as a child “to be miserable.” The reasoning behind this was “if I am miserable someone might come.” She explained that as a child she always felt sad, alone and scared, often crying for hours waiting for someone to come and comfort her.

But all too often this need went unmet. This “childhood decision” was made at a time when she was in deep mourning for the loss of her father. The “decision to be miserable” became a part of her life was likely to be at the core of her depression.

So we tapped on something to this effect:

Even though I made a decision as a child to be miserable, I am an adult now and choose to make a different choice. I choose to be happy and focus on my personal vision of peace instead and let go of the vow I made as a hurt, sad and lonely child.

I spoke to her recently and she reports that, since the session, she has experienced “amazing relief” accompanied by a dramatic decrease in her anxiety levels and physical symptoms (stomach tension). The deep sense of sadness she has carried for such a long time has lifted and she reports feeling much lighter and more at peace.

Uncovering and letting go of the childhood “decision to be miserable” seems to have removed a major roadblock in her life and is allowing her to experience greater happiness. She has since started to take action in areas of her life where she previously felt stuck.

Her career has for a long time been a major source of anxiety for her and immediately after our session she took action by making an appointment with a career counselor to help clarify her career options/direction.

She has continued tapping at home and has started incorporating EFT with her meditation.

As she taps on her current anxiety she is finding more and more links to the past and childhood events which she continues to tap on. Whilst she recognizes the need to do more tapping, she is delighted with the changes she has experienced so far.

As we know, childhood events shape our lives. I can’t help but wonder how different her life may have been if, as a child living under those circumstances, she had EFT by her side to release all those feelings of sadness, hurt and loneliness.

Of course that would not have bought her father back, but the deep pain in her heart that she felt as a child and that manifested as anxiety and depression, could have been significantly eased if she had access to EFT at the time.

I think this highlights the importance of teaching our children to tap so that they have the opportunity, either with an adult or alone in their room or behind the shelter sheds or in any moment of need, to release the strong and overwhelming emotions that they are confronted with. A child who has lost a parent (or suffered any other tragedy/trauma) in today’s age does have access to this wonderful tool and we as adults have the ability to make a difference by teaching it to them.

EFT Tapping Releases Ulcer Pain by Clearing Childhood Trauma

Change your mind with EFT book


By Deb Gimer

I had previously worked with Samantha (not her real name), so she had some knowledge and experience with EFT.

We initially began addressing the pain (SUD level 6) she was experiencing from a recurrent bleeding ulcer. She had also been waking often during the night and not feeling rested in the morning. With began with the Full Basic Recipe, using the Setup Statement:

Even though I have this pain in my stomach from my bleeding ulcer, I love and accept myself and how I feel.

We completed a couple of rounds on the pain and how it felt. Samantha’s pain dropped to 4—5 on the SUD scale. We then tapped while thanking the pain for being present, serving her needs, and keeping her safe. At that point, I saw a shift in her facial expression and asked her if something had come to mind. She said it was a memory from her childhood. After some discussion, we decided to use the Movie Technique.

The memory was of a traumatic childhood event, with an intensity of 10 on the SUD scale. When she focused on the event, she felt very nauseous and kept a wastebasket close at hand in case she had to vomit. When asked if the nausea had a color or shape, Samantha described it as a dark-green, roundish, smooth mass in her stomach that glowed like a cloud around the edges.

The title of Samantha’s movie was “The phone ringing.” We used the Setup Statement:

Even though I feel all this nausea at a 10 when I think about the phone ringing, I deeply and completely accept myself how I feel now and when I was a child when I heard the phone ringing.

There were six crescendos in this event. Each time after clearing a crescendo, we went back to the beginning of the movie before the phone started ringing.

We used the Full Basic Recipe for our tapping, including alternative points and some eye rolls. The Reminder Phrases we used, as supplied by Samantha, were: Listening so intently, please don’t be our ring, oh no heart sinks, it’s ours, I don’t want to go, I have to go, it always ends the same, no way out, just had to do it, no crying.

After all was cleared and she could run through the movie without upset, we proceeded again to tap while thanking the pain in her body for trying to help her and asked it to consider releasing some of the pain, that maybe it wasn’t needed anymore.

During this portion of the session, I paid close attention to how Samantha responded to the words I used. She showed no hesitancy and nodded her head yes throughout, with tears flowing down her face.

I then asked her to place her hands on her heart and take a couple of deep cleansing breaths.

I asked Samantha to check back in with her body regarding the bleeding ulcer pain we had focused on at the start of the session. She paused a minute to push on her stomach where the pain had been. Then she was shocked! She couldn’t believe it–the pain was completely gone!

She explained that had never happened. When the ulcer pain flared up, it took weeks to resolve. And here it was, completely gone, just like that!

I then asked her to remember vividly the movie about the phone ringing and to try and hear the phone ringing. Her facial expression changed, softened, and showed wonderment. She said she could see how the pain/nausea she had experienced so often in her life was really a protective mechanism to keep her safe. The high anxiety and nausea she experienced helped her keep her mouth shut so things didn’t get even worse.

I asked Samantha about the mass in her stomach and she said it was very small and just dark with no color, a 2 on the SUD scale. She said she felt it was fear and that it was what had kept her safe as a child. She wanted to sit with it a while, not yet ready to let it go, but wanted to appreciate it a while before completely releasing it.